perfidy

You may be painfully aware of the Ministry's ongoing series, "Great Mottoes for Lackluster States." We felt that it was unfair for the United States to get all the abuse, and Loyal reader #0018, Nicholas has cheerfully stepped up to the plate and contributed, exclusive to the Ministry of Minor Perfidy, a list of slogans for his homeland of Australia:

• Yes, we have beer.
• If not the Great Southern Land, at least a Pretty Good Southern Land.
• The land of broad expanses, and expansive broads.
• More didgeridoos than you can shake a hollow stick at.
• Now with electricity!
• Come see our bridge.
• No worries mate. At least not after you've finished the other 6-pack.
• Hotter than a monkey's bum.
• More than just a string of beaches, but seriously, who cares?
• Go to the beach and let it all hang out. Well, your stomach, anyway.
• Boasting the best marsupial to tourist ratio in the world.
• Marry an Australian girl, and Bob's your uncle!
• Instead of a Starbucks, we have a pub on every corner.
• Kind of like a cross between Canada and Hell.
• Our national dish is charred meat.
• Texas is small and densely-packed by comparison.
• Cricket - There's no better excuse to drink continuously for 5 days.
• Home of The Big Sheep, The Big Pineapple, and other Humorously Large Items (such as the Prime Minister's eyebrows).
• Did I mention we're all descended from criminals? Hey buddy, nice camera.
• More Wombats per square kilometer than anywhere else.
• Visit Woolloomooloo - It's our Mississippi.
• Strewth!
• England's Alcatraz.
• The land our Prime Minister once called "the arse end of the world". In one of his more polite statements.
• Our national emblem is the cooler.
• If you go home sober, you were somewhere else!

Getting into the spirit of things, here are a few additional slogans which may or may not reflect the true nature of Australia:

• It'll never fly
• Not just a nation, a continent
• Demographically, Australia's people are like soap scum around a sand-filled tub
• We'll fight in any war that has English speaking people in it
• The Greater West Oceania Co-Prosperity Sphere, What'd ya think?
• That's not a knife, this is a knife