This Week in Exemplary Human Behavior
In which the Ministry rewards its loyal readers with a seat on the Group W Bench, next to the father-rapers and mother-stabbers:
For the week ending 29NOV04
Spotlight Thailand: This land, once known for exotic scents, fantastical landscapes, and an elaborate boy-buggering sex trade, can now add school burning as a claim to fame. Southern *ahem* "militants" are blamed for burning five schools, the latest in a series of attacks against institutions and officials. In recent days government ministers or police have been shot, shot at (and missed), or been the victim of a drive-by (by motorcycle. With an axe.) Although as a child I often wished for something catastrophic and permanent to reduce my school to ash, I never actually did it. Of course, it never occurred to me to cloak my sloth and boredom with a political struggle either.
Spotlight "Palestine": The Middle East Media Research Institute features ongoing monitoring and translation of Arabic television and other media. One recent piece featured an homage to what the Arab press calls "martyrdom operations" and I call "twisted fuckers who kill as many people as they can as they snuff themselves". One mother claims she is proud of her martyred son, a son who had everything but wanted no wife. He wanted to be dead, actually, more than he wanted a wife. It's a sick, sick world when blowing yourself up is really the best alternative for the gay youth of Palestine.
Spotlight Congo: Reports have surfaced of some 150 instances of sexual abuse by UN staff members and soldiers in Congo. Reuters had little details at the time of this report, but the words "pedophilia", "rape", and "prostitution" do appear in the same sentence. Thus far only a handful of UN staff have been suspended, while one French and two Tunisian soldiers have been sent home. Characteristic of most things the UN has ever attempted, a half-dozen or so UN officials voiced outrage while admitting their influence was limited, and the Secretary General himself declared that he would implement a new policy.
Spotlight San Diego: A pastor of an unspecified CA church used fear of the devil to lure gullible congregants into having sex with him. He basically had three pickup lines: the devil has already attacked them in some way, and the cure was sex with him; the devil will at some point attempt to harm them, and the prevention was sex with him; or, he threatens to kill you unless you have sex with him. Not sure which is creepier, the sick pastor or the freaky church chicks who fell for his lines. All examples of exemplary human behavior, I daresay.
Spotlight Pennsylvania: A PA woman surrendered to police after admitting she fatally shot her husband for threatening the family pets. She tried to cover her tracks by throwing him in the well and explaining his absence to a hunting trip but confessed to her daughter, who ultimately called police. Apparently there was an argument and a bit of a shoving match, itself more than enough for a Lifetime movie of the moment, but by then threatening the pets he got himself a trip to the coroner.
Spotlight Wiscahnsin: Truck driver and Hmong refugee Chai Vang went buck nutty in the WI woods, offing six hunters and wounding two others. The survivors' stories and Vang's agree as far as what brought them into contact in the first place, but start to diverge at the point where people start getting killed. Vang claims he was called ethnic slurs (I've never heard a Hmong joke in my life, or what I'd call a Hmong if I wanted to insult him...anyone know?) and shot at as he was told to vacate private property. One survivor says he started shooting for no reason. Personally, I'm leaning toward Vang's version. Not that I think it's OK, I just think it's more plausible that in the heat of a tense moment, scared and outnumbered, the guy opened up. Now if it were a white dude, I might believe he started blasting for no reason, same way we do schools, daycares, and company HR offices.
on
| § 9
§ 9 Comments
[ You're too late, comments are closed ]
I'm willing to bet that, in
I'm willing to bet that, in Wisconsin, "slope," "chink," "charlie," etc. apply as universal code for "I'm a dipshit."
I sincerely doubt your average Wisconsiner can tell Hmong folks apart from any other Asian population by sight. Hell, it took me til high school to figure out that Asian people from different countries tend to look different from each other-- where I grew up, "the Asian population" was Lisa Tsang and her parents. I'm willing to bet that most Wisconsonians have that much exposure to folks of Asian extraction, and kind of figure that "Asian" covers it all fine.
None of this explains the assertion that Vang went hunting for people. Scared/outnumbered => Shooty makes sense, from a basic human reaction point of view. Scared/Outnumbered => I Hunt You Down One By One doesn't quite work the same.
J,
J,
OK, I leave it to Buckethead or Ross to share a Hmong joke. You're off the hook.
Another thing though about the coverage of this shooting: there were 2 elements that make it a great, scary read. Element the first: the guy was hunting with an "assault rifle". SKS is a 100-year old design that have been manufactured in China for about the last 60 years. Internal magazine. 10 round capacity. 7.62 round comparable to a .30 hunting round that'll do the job but not over great distance. But it looks scary, so it's an assault rifle, so it'll kill your children in their sleep if you're not careful and ban them all.
Element the second: The vet angle. The guy did a stint in the Guard. In the article I linked and one other source it was mentioned he was a "sharpshooter". By that rationale, I'm a "sharpshooter" too, as are about a gazillion other folks who went through basic rifle marksmanship training. It just means that he got between 31 and...oh, 38 or so on the qual range with his issue M16. In other words, it doesn't mean anything. But it sounds scary somehow, so better get it in there.
All they need now is to determine the guy drove an SUV for the scary media trifecta. There is plenty of weirdness in this story already without having to seek out weirdness where none exists.
GL, interesting. What piques
GL, interesting. What piques my curiosity though is the fact that he nailed 8 people, including a teenage girl. Regardless of the "Scariness" of his SKS rifle (an M1 is the scariest gun in the world in the hands of the wrong person), I'm trying to figure out how he got killshots on 5 people and wounded 3 more, all of whom were, presumably, fleeing in woods, without some sort of serial pursuit.
J,
J,
Funny you bring that up. I just read yet another piece that mentioned he had a 20 round magazine. Coulda been a typo; coulda been ignorance- there are as many gun owners as veterans in America's press corps after all; coulda been true.
If true, that means he either bought it modified or did it himself. I've done this mod myself, and it's super easy. I recall there being one or 2 screws that, once removed, allow you to remove the standard mag and just swap in a 20, 30, or whatever, and it's that simple. Point is he may have had 20 rounds from the get-go, and not 10.
I think it was the TIME piece that I recall creating the impression that there was pursuit. As you say, there simply had to be; the guy didn't have a machine gun and pull a Somme on these people.
The reports I read indicate
The reports I read indicate that only one of the group that confronted Vang was armed. Here's what little else I know:
The guy has a history of short-fuse behavior. Allegedly pulled a gun on his wife, but she declined to press charges.
Hmong culture is supposed to be a shame/face culture. This, combined with #1, might have set him off if one or more of the other hunters ran his yap (thus humiliating him).
Supposedly, the Hmong community is distancing itself from the guy. For whatever that's worth.
Short fuse plus loss of face
Short fuse plus loss of face makes sense to me.
I think that the Hmong response has been a smart and good one. *cheap shot* Would that other communities everywhere be so quick to decry such activity.
... I am informed that the
... I am informed that the Hmong are the biggest Asian population in Wisconsin, to the point where school district websites have a Hmong-language option. So I lay to rest my imprecations against the provinciality of the good people of Wisconsin.
It has been suggested to me that the bigger problem from the point of view of the hunted was that Vang was an out-of-stater from Minnesoter sittin' in their tree stand, which also makes sense. Ever tried to drive thru rural Maine with Massachusetts plates?
J,
J,
OK...how about some Minnesotan jokes?
I never had any problem anywhere with out of state plates. Although, admittedly I did have some trepidation tooling around Geoahgia and Alabammy in my rental car with CT plates.
I used to know some Iowegian
I used to know some Iowegian jokes--courtesy of acquaintances at the American Soybean Association--but I forgot 'em.