perfidy

The homunculi down in the Department for Endogenous Perfidy Tracking (known internally as the DEPT Dept.) have clipped this little piece of stink and sent it upstairs for my review.

Campaign mail with a return address of the Republican National Committee (news - web sites) warns West Virginia voters that the Bible will be prohibited and men will marry men if liberals win in November.

The literature shows a Bible with the word "BANNED" across it and a photo of a man, on his knees, placing a ring on the hand of another man with the word "ALLOWED." The mailing tells West Virginians to "vote Republican to protect our families" and defeat the "liberal agenda."

Republican National Committee Chairman Ed Gillespie said Friday that he wasn't aware of the mailing, but said it could be the work of the RNC. "It wouldn't surprise me if we were mailing voters on the issue of same-sex marriage," Gillespie said.

The flier says Republicans have passed laws protecting life, support defining marriage as between a man and a woman and will nominate conservative judges who will "interpret the law and not legislate from the bench."

"The liberal agenda includes removing `under God' from the Pledge of Allegiance," it says. . . .

Gillespie said same-sex marriage is a legitimate issue in the election. President Bush (news - web sites) has proposed amending the Constitution to ban gay marriage. Democratic Sen. John Kerry (news - web sites) also opposes gay marriage but said a constitutional amendment is going too far.

The RNC also is running radio ads in several states urging people to register to vote.

"There is a line drawn in America today," one ad says. "On one side are the radicals trying to uproot our traditional values and our culture. They're fighting to hijack the institution of marriage, plotting to legalize partial birth abortion, and working to take God out of the pledge of allegiance and force the worst of Hollywood on the rest of America."

"Are you on their side of the line?" the ad asks before making the plea to "support conservative Republican candidates."

Shit, Phyllis! They're onto us. You conservative toads have literally no idea what you're in for if the Liberal Party wins in the Fall. And I do mean Fall for those of you of a pentecostal bent. Our hate for this nation will go unchecked like a drunken slavering invert bound for perversion on a Saturday night in lower Manhattan. Nothing but wall to wall gay sex (and bondage!) on TV 24/7. Public schools will teach nothing that has not been thoroughly cleansed (some would say purged, but that's such an ugly word, don't you think?) of all racial, ethnic, religious, or non-New-York regional overtones. Private schools will be banned-- in fact, isn't private property as a concept just a bit louche these days? Abortions on demand for everyone! Little plastic flags for the rest! Congress will become a rump for the International Homosexual Caucus (get it... rump?). Your guns will all be rounded up and melted down to make prisons for fundamentalists. With bondage.

It's not you we hate. It's your freedom.

Within ten years, every city from Biloxi to Boise will become a haven for the expensive-coffee-and-cardigan-over-the-shoulders-oooh!-oooh!-are-those-John-Fluevog-shoes crowd. In fact, you will all be that crowd. The national language will be French. The national sport will be volleyball. Men's volleyball. Your precious "700 Club" will be yanked from the air and replaced with a daily "666 Club" hosted jointly by Michael Moore and Barbra Streisand (with musical guest Michael Jackson). We plan to introduce legislation outlawing heterosexuality forever and mandating the more esoteric sides of BDSM. The national currency will feature an engraved depiction of the "dirty Sanchez." We will control the horizontal. We will control the vertical. Your kids will meditate in school. Your kids will meditate in school. Your kids will meditate in school. Your kids will meditate in school.

[wik] ... or maybe the mouthbreathers who circulate this tripe are the right's equivalent of the Larouche Democrats, and nobody takes it seriously. Is it too much to hope that absolutely nobody will take this stuff seriously?

[alsø wik] Why oh why do I hate freedom so dang much?!?

[alsø alsø wik] Not that I'm all that much of a flaming liberal anyway. Indeed, I'm a self-described economic centrist and social libertine (... I mean libertarian), but if some part o' the GOP designed the foregoing noxiousness to be exactly on message for some portion of the country, then I should probably revise my notion of where exactly the center is.

[wi nøt trei a høliday in Sweden this yër?] In fact, does it make anyone else a little ill that Ed Gillespie, the administrative head of one of our two major political parties purporting to represent half of all of us and what we all think in a normal non-hallucinatory state, did not run screaming from this dose of poison, but rather shrugged complaisently and said "sure. maybe. It sounds like something we'd do."? As Patton said in the comments, "May a pox descend on all their houses, the fuckers."

[see the løveli lakes...] Then again, the GOP let Sheri Dew open their national convention. Sheri "At first it may seem a bit extreme to imply a comparison between the atrocities of Hitler and what is happening in terms of contemporary threats against the family—but maybe not" Dew. That's some big-ass tent the GOP have got if they can make room for the terminally insane. Yay, America!

[the wøndërful telephøne system...] Buckethead has since posted on the possibility that "memogate" may be linked to the Kerry campaign. Query: would that be worse, or just different, than telling the voters in West Virginia that the Liberals, who are apparently the true backers of John Kerry, are dead set on banning the Bible?

[and mäni interesting furry animals...] I should have mentioned before that Norbizness is the fount of this outrage. Thanks, Texas, for giving us a President, a Norbizness, and Kelly Willis!