perfidy

Creed have broken up, and the band's members are starting new projects. At least two albums by Creed alumni are due out by the end of the year.

The tragedy of cancer is if you don't kill it, it will eventually metastasize. Then you're really screwed.

Bernard Law, otherwise known as Cardinal Bernard Law of Boston, Protector of Babytouchers, has been reassigned by the Pope. I'm not Catholic, not by a long shot, so I don't pretend to know too much of how the church works traditionally. I do know that the priesthood takes care of its own, but even so it seems wrong that a man who is largely responsible for covering up and perpetuating a widespread and decades-long child abuse crisis, who knowingly allowed children to be put in danger of abuse time and again, is now being rewarded with the "archpriest[hood] of St. Mary Major Basilica," one of "'the four most important basilicas' in Rome," with a probable "10,000 euro monthly stipend, or about $12,000," a post which is "also likely to make Cardinal Law one of the most influential Americans in the Vatican."

I don't mean to malign the Catholic church. This just doesn't make a bit of sense to me. Why give Law a Roman sinecure and the Pope's ear, instead of putting him quietly to pasture somewhere out of the way?

Somebody forgot to tell John Ashcroft that he's not in charge here. The same group he claimed was going to attack the US soon-- soon!, the Abu Hafs al-Masri Brigades, are the same defunct band of jokers who "claimed responsibility for the power blackout in the Northeast last year, a power outage in London and the Madrid bombing. None of the claims was found to be credible."

Hat tip to Norbizness.

Now they're trying to ban flavored cigarettes. Specifically, douchebag Ohioan Mike Dewine (R-Monkeybutt Junction) is introducing the "Family Smoking Prevention and Tobacco Control Act" into Congress in an effort to crack down on fruit- and candy-flavored cigarettes that trick millions of kids into smoking them. Or some bullplop to that effect.

I don't know about you, but I was at college in the early 1990s when grunge, the "Singles" soundtrack, and flannel ruled the day. There is no smell in the world more sure to bring those heady days flooding back in all their hazy pretentious glory than the smell of a clove cigarette. Ahhh, cloves.

Now, I know that clove cigarettes are supposed to be bad for you and stuff, but please. One of the many pleasures of young adulthood is experimenting with funny-tasting smokables like those weird Egyptian cigarilloes flavored with cherry and that American Spirit "peace pipe blend" that kind of tastes like a hippie's wool socks. Beyond my own selfish desires to see successive generations enjoy the same odiferious pursuits I once did (and with no lasting brain damage-- honest!!?>()#QWERTYU$$$), I have to ask: is this law really, really necessary?

Or is this just another way for parents to let the government raise good compliant kids for them so they don't have to take the time?

I had the singular pleasure, last Friday, of being invited to drive two hours through DC traffic to my company's headquarters in lovely Herndon, hard by the Dulles International Airport, to be informed that I was laid off. There were no positions in the company matching my skill set, and sadly, I must be let go. But hey, we loved working with you! And you're high on our recall list! Stay tuned!

For the last couple weeks, I had been uneasy about my situation. The project that I was working on had run into difficulties, as a result of the client's unwillingness or inability to realize that you can't provide a complete picture of a software system until after it is built. The purpose of a design document is to show the path forward, giving a general idea of how problems will be solved, and what methods will be used to instantiate business rules and processes in code. Naturally, many details will not be known until the code is actually written.

So, two weeks ago, after the system design document was rejected for the fourth time, higher powers within my company sacked the PM in order to save the contract. I was concerned at the time because the problem centered on documentation, and I am a technical writer. But when I wasn't fired immediately, I began to feel somewhat safer. That was mistaken, and it does seem that I had been blackened with the same brush that painted the PM out of the picture. Needless to say, I think this is a bit off base, as the government didn't have issues with the grammar, style or format of the document - all of which were within my purvue - but rather with the content and direction of the design.

After a long drive home, half a pack of cigarettes, and some well chosen words, I was home. And I found that I was not really as upset as I might have been. My son was in the backyard slowly learning how to move rapidly over uneven terrain. My wife had a beer for me. Life ain't bad. Over the weekend, I have already developed several leads on jobs. But if any of our gentle readers is aware of any job openings in the field of technical writing or editing in the DC metro area, I would be pleased and grateful to hear of them.

Instapundit has the terrible, awful, shameful story.

On the day after September 11, Micki Weinberg walked to the UC Berkeley campus still in shock. At the entrance to campus, facing Telegraph Avenue, huge sheets of blank paper were spread out as an impromptu memorial on which students, faculty, and other passersby were invited to write comments. Glad to have found such a forum, Weinberg scanned the inscriptions. Then he saw one, large and clear, that stopped him dead in his tracks:
"It's the Jews, stupid."

The slender Weinberg, a year younger than most freshmen, had only just arrived at Cal from Beverly Hills, where he had been president of his high school's Shalom Club. As a young teenager, he had savored heady stories of how Mario Savio and his comrades in the Free Speech Movement danced the hora and sang "Hava Nagila" at sit-ins and peace rallies forty years ago. The son of left-wing, Jewish intellectuals, Weinberg viewed himself as one too, having spent the summer before his senior year of high school in Myanmar, cataloguing the archives of Rangoon's disintegrating and depopulated Jewish synagogue. "That's why I came to Berkeley -- because of its strong romantic aura of the Free Speech Movement and Mario Savio," he recalls. "Then I got here and discovered that that light seems to have been extinguished. You have this vitriol. You feel it everywhere. Berkeley is now the epicenter of real hatred."

Almost three years later, Weinberg graduates this month as a student whose days at Cal were marked by what he calls "pinnacles of horror," in the pinched tone of a man betrayed. He remembers pro-Palestinian protesters insisting that Israeli border crossings are as bad as Nazi death camps. He remembers the glass front door of Berkeley's Hillel building -- where he attends Friday night services -- shattered by a cinderblock, with the message FUCK JEWS scrawled nearby. He remembers the spray-painted swastikas discovered one Monday morning last September on the walls of four lecture rooms in LeConte Hall accompanied by the chilling bilingual message, "Die, Juden. "

Just when you think things can't get worse, they do. What the hell has happened to the radical left? And when will they figure out that they're cutting a hideous figure?

Though brgdt of Female Planet will have my head for this, I wish George Lucas could learn to leave things well enough the hell alone.

Think back to the final scene of "Jedi," either the original version or the new enslickened one foisted on the world a few years ago. Who were the three ghostly figures standing by the bonfire?

Were they these guys? Or do you remember something juuuuuust a little different about one of them?

Image thanks to Aint' It Cool News.

Found this over at Phil's. It's well worth a read. The studied indifference of the beautiful people to the very real suffering of any Cuban who dares speak against Uncle Fidel is an abomination. Where is their support for those who speak truth to power, and subvert the dominant paradigm, when that power is a communist? People who fall over themselves saying America should be a pariah among nations for our pragmatic alliances with unsavory types during the cold war gush at the thought of meeting Castro. Sick. But read this piece, to get another angle on the sickness.

I'm sorry. I've spent a lot of time over the last few days feeling terrible about the prisoner photos coming out of Iraq, but now I have something to help, a veritable balm to soothe my anguish. I apologize for assuming the worst.

As Pfc. Lynndie England, she of the cigarette, leashes, and goofy mugging for the camera, explains, she and her peers were just following orders. End of debate. As a soldier, she is not allowed to question what orders to follow, much less exercise discretion when those orders fall outside the bounds of decency, wartime or otherwise. Nope, no reason at all to go up the chain of command to verify orders. She those others like here are not to blame. They were just following orders. Did I mention she said she was under orders?

Good enough for the Nazis, good enough for her. I feel so much better now.

Idiot.

[wik] It makes me wonder exactly how those orders would be phrased. "PFC England, I order you to behave like a douchebag," something like that? Or was it something more? "PFC England, I order you to stand there by the naked guys... a little to the right... Ok... now smoke that cigarette... great. Now... point at their weiners like there's something funny to see.. perfect.... No no, look at the camera, that's an order... hold it... hold it.... OK, got it on film. Stand down."

Idiot.

What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Can I give you two fives for a ten?

I'm sure by now all of you have had a chance to see (and recoil from) the shameful conduct of some of our soldiers in Iraq.

Rather than be redundant, I'm going to turn this screed over to Sgt. Stryker.

Every single angle of this story is disgusting and infuriating, but let me start with Staff Sergeant Chip Frederick. He's charged with "maltreatment for allegedly participating in and setting up a photo, and for posing in a photograph by sitting on top of a detainee. He is charged with an indecent act for observing one scene. He is also charged with assault for allegedly striking detainees – and ordering detainees to strike each other."

What's his defense for failing not only as an NCO, but as a human being? "'We had no support, no training whatsoever. And I kept asking my chain of command for certain things...like rules and regulations, says Frederick. 'And it just wasn't happening.'"

The first rule of a coward, when caught, is to play stupid. The second is to blame someone else. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure I don't need a superior to tell me that attaching wires to someone's genitals or beating the living shit out of them is unacceptable. What are you, a fucking idiot?

. . . .

[D]id anyone ever tell you that maintaining discipline and standards of conduct is your main charge as an NCO? Did this piece of training slip through the cracks as well? You know, I wear the same uniform. I'm an NCO as well. Not only have you disgraced yourself, your unit, your country and humanity, your actions have disgraced me and everyone else who wears that uniform. Your stupidity, ignorance, and cruelty have stained all of us, because of that uniform we all wear. It's the binding tie that connects not only all of us serving today, but everyone who has ever served and those who will serve in the future. That uniform is stained with the noble blood of those who've fallen in battle for their country, but you have smeared that uniform -my uniform!- with the excrement of malevolent barbarism.

You have failed in every possible way a soldier can fail. You failed, as an NCO, to maintain basic standards of military order and discipline. You failed, as a soldier, to maintain the highest standards of conduct required of you by the United States Government. You failed, as a human being, to afford even the slightest bit of dignity and respect to those placed under your care. And what do you have to say in your defense? You only offer excuses that blame everyone else but yourself. You, and those who shared in your depravity, are a disgrace and a shame. May the military justice system have more mercy on you than you could muster for your own prisoners.

As with everything in life, there is a Simpsons quote that applies to the situation: "Videotaping this crime spree is the best idea we ever had!" (Jimbo Jones, episode 5F13). The difference is, of course, that Jimbo Jones is a cartoon figure who stole a Parking Enforcement buggy, and the accused soldiers are disgraceful fuckwit douchebags masquerading as worthy human beings who have given our enemies the perfect propaganda, and have signed the death warrants of many soldiers and citizens of free nations around the world. Nice work, guys. Al Jazeera wasn't quite getting the message across on their own.

GeekLethal found a wonderful toy, with which you can create wonders such as this: 

CHEYENNE, WY - After attempting to contain a living-room blaze started by a cigarette, card-carrying Libertarian Trent Jacobs reluctantly called the Cheyenne Fire Department Monday. "Although the community would do better to rely on an efficient, free-market fire-fighting service, the fact is that expensive, unnecessary public fire departments do exist," Jacobs said. "Also, my house was burning down." Jacobs did not offer to pay firefighters for their service.

From our dear, beloved, Onion.

The Beeb reports that Canada - you know, the kindler, gentler, greener and morally superior nation to our north - is condemning to death hundreds of thousands of defenseless seals. The government defended the move as more humane - they're gonna shoot the little bastards instead of the traditional club to the head. It appears that crass economic motives are the motivation for this return to senseless animal cruelty, as commercial fish stocks were vanishing, and the cull was important for the local economy during a traditionally slow economic time of the year.

Me, I think them seals is commies.

How can you not club a face like that?

For more info on the mechanics of seal slaughtering, go see the Nuke Baby Seals for Jesus site.

A great many people are taking dKos to task for this statement

That said, I feel nothing over the death of merceneries. They aren't in Iraq because of orders, or because they are there trying to help the people make Iraq a better place. They are there to wage war for profit. Screw them.

A lot of bandwidth has been wasted on finding just the right adjective for Kos in the wake of this stunningly rectrocranial eructation: "Cuban-style Socialist," "heartless" and so on.

Gentlemen, gentlemen, let's not bicker! Let's just all agree that one word sums up the Daily Kos on this day: "dickhead."

As much as I appreciate the effort that the creator of worlds has put into his epic photoshopped picture series, the medium just leaves me cold. Just like Opera, really. I recognize the talent and artistry, but in the end it's just fat people singing in languages I don't understand.

But this one panel really worked for me. Connected, you know, on a deep and personal level. As Allah might say, it makes a kufr feel funny in the pants:

[wik] As an added bonus, I'm unilaterally adding the Creator of Worlds to the blogroll. You got a problem with that, Jew?

Via Reason I am reminded that last night the President mocked me on television. Me, and millions like me, who have been kind of disturbed over his inability to provide a straight answer about pre-libervasion intelligence about WMD's in Iraq, or what has since happened to them. I caught it on the tube while flipping around looking for "South Park," and stuck around long enough to be told that my grave misgivings about our intelligence capabilities and the probity of our national leaders are a punchline to a weak-ass joke. So screw him.

Speaking at the "Radio and Television Correspondents' Association" dinner on Tuesday, Bush did his usual schticky slideshow of Funny Fotos, including this laffer

[Monitor shows a photo of] Bush looking under furniture in a fruitless, frustrating search. "Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere," he said.

Whoo, ha! Sticking it to those pansyass critics who were all like, "Ooh, where's the weapons, Mr. President?" "Ooh, Mr. Bush... where'd the weapons go?" "Ooh, we like Communism and smelling our own butts, Mr. President. And we're probably gay! And where did the weapons go?" And then Bush was all like, "Hey, man. It's cool. Look! Tax cuts!"

OK, first of all, the guy who made the bit of fuss over Richard Simmons being in the room was out of line. If it had been me, I might have noticed him, might not have, might have cared less, but probably not. As things stand, the guy is filing charges now, misdemeanor assault I believe.

But.

If Richard Simmons ever slapped me, I don't know if I'd fall on the floor laughing or give him the most thorough beat-down of his (admittedly youthful) 55 years. And I'm no brawler; I'm actually a big fat candy-ass. But you just can't let a sissy slap you in the mouth and let it go. Period.

Would he at least approve of me working up a sweat by kicking his ass?

Blackfive, the Paratrooper of Love, has assembled a wonderful collection of pithy comments from Late Night TV regarding John Kerry. My favorites:

From Jay Leno:

"The White House begun airing their TV commercials to re-elect the president, and the John Kerry campaign is condemning his use of 9/11 in the ads. He said, it is conscionable to use the tragic memory of a war in order to get elected, unless of course, it's the Vietnam War."

"They had a profile of John Kerry on the news and they said his FIRST WIFE was worth around $300 million and his SECOND WIFE, his current wife, is worth around $700 million. His intern (with whom he supposedly had an affair) was worth several more million. So when John Kerry says he's going after the wealthy in this country, he's not just talking. He's doing it!" - Jay Leno

From the Daily Show's Jon Stewart, on Kerry calling his Secret Service Agent a Son-Of-A-Bitch:

"What. An. Ass."

As an addendum to Johno's post on the Scopes Monkey Trial for the new millennium, here is a picture of the Right Honorable County Commissioner J.C. Fugate, image courtesy of our good friend Norbizness:

And to think, some people thought the movie Joe Dirt was a parody. Sheesh.