To Our Brothers in the Piedrivers' Local 114
Loyal reader #0017 (EDog) notes that pizza delivery drivers in Detroit are trying to start a national union of pizza drivers, arguing "the large chains have been taking advantage of them for years."
Well, yeah. That's why a union won't fly. It's also why there's no union in the music industry or the temp agency world. Any job that requires marginal skills and draws on a mobile or unstable workforce can never unionize: there are literally hundreds of people who would gladly kill you for your shitty job.
But still, good luck guys. If you succeed, and my pizza is late, am I gonna have to file a grievance?
Posted by
Johno
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So you've noticed that the
So you've noticed that the AFofM isn't really a union, grasshopper...well done.
Ken, I actually take gentle
Ken, I actually take gentle exception to that. The AFofM is cute, and not a real union, but at least they were able to organize. I was thinking more of the corporate side of things-- label gofers, publicity underlings, wranglers, coordinators, and assistant assistants. I worked at record labels for a few years in shit jobs for shit money and shit treatment, but knew the whole time that if I even looked like I was fed up, there was an unemployed hipster army eager to eat my corpse for a shot at less money and more shit.
(An RV pulls into the parking
(An RV pulls into the parking lot, it appears to be the Good Ole Boys. Jake and Elwood walk towards them)
Jake: Excuse me gentlemen, are you the Good Ole Boys?
Tucker: Yeah, that's right, I'm Tucker McElroy, lead singer, driver of the Winnebago. Listen, I'd like to talk to you son, but were running very late.
(Jake holds up a crunched cigarette packet, as though it were an ID badge)
Jake: My name is Jacob Stein, the American Federation of Musicians Union local 200. I've been sent here to see if you gentlemen are carrying your permits.
Tucker: Our what?
Jake: Your union cards. May I see your cards please?
Tucker: Suppose we ain't got no union cards and we go in there and start playing anyway. Now what you gonna do about that? You gonna stop us, Stein? You're gonna look pretty funny trying to eat corn on the cob with no fucking teeth!
Jake: Listen, let me talk to Bob, the owner, see if we can put your band on contract waivers for tonight. I don't want you to move from this spot. Just let me handle this.
Elwood: We'll ah.. we'll talk to Bob.
"there are literally hundreds
"there are literally hundreds of people who would gladly kill you for your shitty job."
Or at the very least for the $$ you have on you. I used to know a driver...was robbed thrice last I knew, at least once at gunpoint. Like, lay-face-down-on-the-ground-with-a-gun-on-you kind of gunpoint.
Would this union provide some sort of route security in addition to job security?
Would the piedriver's union
Would the piedriver's union (I love the sound of that) agitate for arming pizza drivers, like the airline pilot's unions did? We don't want terrorists crashing a pizza delivery car into our houses. (Of course, the pizza delivery car is ususally mom's camry.)