perfidy

Buckethead noted this weekend that Canadians were outraged by the antics of Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog during Conan O'Brien's recent Canada trip.

Oh, please. I love Canada and Canadians. I really do. I'd fit in there. But the nation has a little bit of an inferiority thing. Any time a Canadian of any stature comes up in conversation, whether it's Mike Meyers, Neil Young, or Winnipeg mayor Glen Murray, any Canadian present in the conversation is required by law to say, "Ya know, they're Canadian."

Yes, we know. And they're probably funnier and play better guitar than Americans, too. And yes, we know about Smarties and how great fries are with gravy and cheese, and of course the Maple Leaves, the Rough Riders, and the Rough Riders are the greatest sports teams in the history of sport.

But please, Canada, grow a pair. Check out what Triumph said to Quebecois last week that caused all the fureur:

"So you're French and Canadian, yes? You're obnoxious and dull."

"I can tell you're French, you know. You have that proud expression, that superior look, and I can smell your crotch from here."

Now that's comedy. I have to say, my reaction is summed up best by Toronto Star columnist Vinay Menon: "I can't believe this country was successfully baited by a damn hand puppet."

Me neither.