perfidy

Calpundit points us to a parallel-universe press conference transcript with House Speaker Dennis Hastert (have you ever noticed that "Hastert" sounds a lot like "Hastur," as if an Ancient Evil were now empowered to speak on behalf of the duly elected representatives of the citizens of the USA? I wonder if you go insane if you look into his eyes long enough... that sure would explain a lot...)*

The trouble is, this parallel-universe conference was only parallel if you reduce our n-dimensional space to n=1: that is to say, it actually happened. In this universe.

Hastur^&^&^&...Hastert, sorry, was a little steamed over trouble with the President's people and a transportation bill. Read on!

Q You met with the administration yesterday. Did they say they would support the target number?

Speaker Hastert. We need to go forward, we need to go to conference with the Senate, and then if they want to be involved in that conference, they certainly will be able to be involved in it.

Q But did they say they would sign?

Speaker Hastert. They didn't make a commitment.

Q Did they say they would veto it?

Speaker Hastert. They didn't say they would veto it.

Q Is that with the President or with the people?

Speaker Hastert. That is with the President. I don't deal with his people anymore.

[snip]

Q Sir, what did you mean by that last comment: That was with the President; I don't deal with his people anymore?

Speaker Hastert. Well, we weren't getting straight numbers from his people, and they changed their mind in the middle of the process. So we are going to do what we feel we need to do.

Q Just on this issue or on

Speaker Hastert. On this issue.

Q Or in general?

Speaker Hastert. On this issue.

Q Sir --

Q What kind of numbers were you getting from them?

Speaker Hastert. Different numbers.

Q Different from?

Speaker Hastert. Where they added up.

Well, all-righty-ho, then. I'll just leave this up with no comment.

[wik]* Vote Yog-Soth-Oth in 2004! Why settle for lesser evil?