perfidy

Some have advanced the theory that the Iraqi National Museum (INM) was robbed by a fanatical Amish sect, equipped and trained by the Illuminati-controlled Mossad. The Amish sect (known to opponents as the "Unpaved Amish," due to their resistance to such modern amenities as brick paved roads, but called Der Geheime, Heilige Auftrag des alten Erbrechenabschaums amongst themselves) has been gathering ancient artifacts for eons, even before they migrated to the new world. In a secret compound in Knox county, Ohio, (designed by Aleister Crowley) they store these artifacts, in the hopes of furthering their plans for total world domination by means of antediluvian thaumaturgy.

Or maybe it was the stinking, herring-eating Norwegians.